The Messianic Gentile

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A romance novel I am working on.

It was a foggy day in April, as Dawn walked out in the open field. She hardly knew where she

was going. She just knew she needed to get away from people, from work. She was under a lot of stress lately and had not been able to release it. The sun tried to peek out of the fog but was quickly swallowed up again. Just as well, Dawn thought, its seems just like my life. The moment someone comes into my life, they disappear just as quick. She was lonely, but more than just lonely. She needed someone to fulfill her life, to give it what she needed, love, real love. Not just time in bed or dinner with a night out on the town, she wanted love.

It was about an hour later when Dawn realized that she did not know where she was. She had just come up to an old barn on a far corner of the field. "Hello" she called out, and was very surprised when she heard a man call out "Hello" back from within the barn. "Can I help you" the voice called out again. "Yes" Dawn replied. "I’m lost, can you help me?". The small side door of the barn opened in the mist and the man came out in jeans and a flannel shirt. He had a thick beard and a outdoors look and had a rake in his hand. A worker Dawn thought. "I’m trying to get back to Douglas Park where I left my car, but I’m afraid I wasn’t paying much attention to where I was walking.""Well," the man replied, "I’m Thomas and this is my farm your on. You are about 5 miles from Douglas Park." "Can I give you a ride back, I have my truck out back?" Dawn thought about it for a moment as whether to except the ride or not, but she looked into Thomas’s eyes, she saw true peace, like what she needed in her life.

Steve, her ex-husband never gave her peace, only grief. He never loved her, rather all he wanted from her was sex, sex and to keep house for him. He never cared for her, never was tender and loving, never wanted to just hold her. He just told her that sex was love, that anything else was a waste of time. The more she thought about Steve, the more she hurt inside.

"Are you all right?" "Miss, are you ok?" Thomas was talking to her. It brought her back from the past, "Yes, yes I’m alright" Dawn whispered on the verge of tears. Then she started to cry. All the anger and resentment at the way Steve had treated her just came out. "Whoa, easy now miss, I won’t hurt you." He gently touched her shoulder as she wept. She didn’t know what made her do it. Maybe it was his eyes, or maybe just the peace he gave off. Either way she surprised herself when she turned to him and clung to him, holding him close. Thomas did not know what to make of this woman holding onto him, he just knew she was hurting and that she needed something, she needed love.

As Thomas held her, he gently put his left arm around her and with his right hand, softly stroked her light brown hair as she laid her head on his shoulder. He held her that way for about ten minutes, until she calmed down and the tears stopped. "I, I’m sorry, I’m not usually like this around a stranger." Dawn finally said with her eyes wet with tears and her make-up long ruined.

"It’s ok" Thomas replied, "I see the hurt in your eyes" "And I’m sorry." "Why are you sorry" Dawn asked curiously, "you haven’t hurt me" Thomas thought for a moment. Avoiding her question for the moment he said "If you have a little time, I have all the makings of a picnic in my truck, I could fix you a little something to eat."

Now Dawn was curious. "Why would you have a picnic way out here." Well," he said " I always bring a big lunch when I come work at this old barn, because I know I’ll be here all day and, well, since I live alone, here is just as good a place to eat as any other, that and its beautiful out here." Dawn started to protest, "It wouldn’t be right for you to give up your lunch, after all, you are the one working out here." "But," he said, "I have more than enough, and I would be honored if you would join me, and have lunch. It might even cheer you up some, Ok?" Just as Dawn was thinking about it, her stomach rumbled and she remembered that she had skipped breakfast that morning so she could get away from the house quicker. "Well" "If it is not an imposition, ok, and, I’m Dawn.""You are the beginning of the day." Thomas replied softly. "What" she asked. "Your name" he said, "It means the beginning of the day", he finished.

Thomas grabbed the basket out of the bed of the truck and brought it and a small cooler as well. As he opened the side door, he held it and waited for her to walk in first."Thanks" she said, thinking that Steve never held a door for her, but would expect her to make her own way in. Just thinking about Steve angered her even more. Still, she looked as Thomas followed her in, she thought to herself, "This man intrigues me more and more".

Could he be an angel in disguise? She hoped not. She needed him to be real.

Half way though the meal, Dawn just sat there watching Thomas. She couldn’t put her finger on it, but there was something about him that set her at ease. Thomas noticed she wasn’t eating and asked, "Is the food ok," "Yes, yes it’s great, its, just that" she hesitated "I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be burdening you with my personal problems." Thomas looked deep into Dawn’s eyes, "You have been hurt deeply, and it’s pulling you down" Dawn frowning, "How could you know that" "How could know what I’m feeling?"He thought for a moment, then said to her "The best way I can put it is that what your feeling is showing in your eyes, and, I care that you are hurt" "If it’s possible, I would like to help you." Dawn felt the tears start up again. Thomas moved over to sit next to her, and touched her on the shoulder, caressing it slowly. And for the second time, Dawn turned and put her arms around him again, crying. This time Thomas held her in his arms, caressing her back. After a couple of moments, Dawn moved her head back, and looked into his eyes. "What is it Dawn." Thomas asked in a whisper. "You’re the first person to ever hold me like this, thank you". Dawn said as she began to smile. "You’re welcome, Dawn". And he kissed her on the forehead.

After cleaning up the lunch things, Thomas took her around to the back of the barn to his truck. He opened the passenger door and motioned for her to get in. Then he went around and got in the driver side.

The drive back to Douglas Park was quiet, neither person saying anything. Dawn was thinking to herself, "I have to come back and see Thomas again, there is something wonderful about him, something I need".

Thomas pulled up to the silver Honda that Dawn said was hers. As she got out, she hesitated. "What is it Dawn," Thomas inquired. "Thomas, could I come visit you at the barn again sometime?" Dawn asked shyly. "Well, I will be back there tomorrow to finish up the work in it. You’re welcome to come out, though I will give you a map so you can drive there rather than having to walk." He drew her a map of the roads that would lead her back to the barn and gave it to her. "Thanks," she said "You have been wonderful". " If I can ever be of help, let me know" Thomas said with a smile. She noticed this and said "That’s the first time I have seen you smile". Thomas thought for a second, "I was just thinking that I was able to cheer you up and was glad, you are a beautiful woman, with a beautiful soul, you should always smile and have peace in your heart". Dawn said in a little above a whisper "I have some now thanks to you" "Well, see you tomorrow, and thanks again for lunch". "You’re welcome and I look forward to seeing you tomorrow".

Dawn watched as Thomas drove off back to his barn. She felt a little bit of sadness and loss as she got into her car and started for home. Home, how strange it sounded, since it was just a one bedroom apartment a half mile from work. But, as she lived by herself now, it was a bit more peaceful going home than it had been when she and Steve were married. She had dreaded going home after work then. As Steve got off work before she did, he was usually waiting on her when she got home. He would hound her until she had dinner on the table while not even offering to help in any way. "That’s why I married you" he had told her one day when she asked him to help her fix dinner, "I expect you to take care of the house and cook, after all, I bring home the bacon". That had hurt her so deep that she did not speak to Steve for a week. Even afterward, he never apologized for hurting her.

They were only married for a year when Steve told Dawn that he was divorcing her. She had asked him why, and he replied in disgust, " You nag me and never want to pull your weight around the house, always complaining that I don’t show you love. Didn’t I buy you that diamond ring when we were married?"Oh that made her angry. "A ring is not a hug, a ring is not telling me you love me, a ring is not helping me without me having to ask you", She fired back. "Well, " he said, "If it doesn’t mean anything to you, then I want it back" She looked at him with tears forming in her eyes, and her heart breaking, finally she pulled the ring off and threw it at him. That night she packed her bags and left him. She did not know where to go, but ended up staying at a friends house for a couple of days until she could find an apartment.